


The Case of the Nearsighted Detective

by standbygo



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: 221B Ficlet, Fluff and Crack, Gen, M/M, Retirementlock, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-01
Updated: 2014-04-01
Packaged: 2018-01-17 18:42:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1398466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/standbygo/pseuds/standbygo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of text messages between Sherlock and John. Sherlock accuses, John is amused.</p><p>"You knpw I hate then, dont make fun"  </p><p>"That’s it, you’ve gone round the twist. What are you talking about?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Case of the Nearsighted Detective

**Author's Note:**

> I just finished writing a terribly angsty fic, and needed something crack to help me out.
> 
> Bolded type is Sherlock's text, italics are John's.

**Very funnu Hohn**

 

_What?_

 

**Dont play innicent, dosnt suut you**

 

_Sherlock?_

 

**Where arw you?**

 

_Doing the shopping in town, I told you before I left._

 

**Where jave you put them**

**You knpw I hate then, dont make fun**

 

_That’s it, you’ve gone round the twist. What are you talking about?_

_And what’s with the creative spelling?_

 

**Bloodu smalll bittons**

**Where have you hiddem then?**

 

_Hiddem?_

 

**Hiddenn**

 

_Oh, hidden. What have I hidden?_

 

**Specs dmmit**

 

_Your new spectacles? Jesus, you just bought them._

_Took me months to convince you that you needed them, and now you think I stole them?_

 

**I kniw you didd it, don’t deny**

 

_I do deny._

_Where did you last see them?_

 

**Cant see then, on my gloody face werent theu?**

 

_You had them on when I went for the shopping, you were at the microscope. Then what?_

 

**You ttook them obbipusly**

 

_No I didn’t, I promise._

 

**Well wehere are theu?**

 

…

 

_Sherlock, I love you._

_Go look in the mirror._

 

…

 

**Fuck off.**

 

_Oh my God._

_They were on your head weren’t they._

 

**We will never speak of this.**

 

_People are staring at me because I’m laughing so hard._

 

**I will bury you in a shallow grave, John.**

 

_I’ll be home in half an hour, you can kill me then._

 

**Consider it done.**

**I love you too.**

**Moron.**

 

 _Berk_. 

 


End file.
